The Reason For Change

From the darkest caves to the brightest fields, I haven’t found my reasoning

I thought I was in the right dream but I guess I’m in for a rude awakening

I stayed in my dream because I didn’t want to face the harsh truth called reality

Nothing was wrong with reality, it was just that everything was right with the dream

For the most part, In the reality that we all live in I am just a nobody

A nobody who wants to just stay in a dream land because nothing is as it seems

I guess it’s because of the things I had hopes in, I had given up on

When I had given up on everything I lost the fight to win these demons over

And then one thing lead to the other and I started losing from that point on

I tried being drunk in love and it turns out I’m better off sober

I tried trusting the ones I was close with and I suffered the pain in my back by the knifes

I tried listening to music to leave the world but I became deaf of the sounds that were pure

I tried sleeping the pain away but it came back worse than ever

I tried to talk to people about it but no one seems to understand 

I tried and I tried and I tried but it was never good enough 

I’m just a nobody who people gives a name so he can be recognized

My name is the person who sleeps in class but they don’t know he loses it

My name is the person who is loud but funny but he never hung out with kids his age

My name is the person who smiles the brightest but they don’t know it’s just for show

My name is the person who is always laughing but they don’t know that he is crying at night

My name is Nobody because everyone has a click to hang out with but you’ll catch me alone

This is just a poem so don’t change up on me because it’s better off this way

Because as soon as I change it myself, the negativity along with the old me will decay

— anonymous